I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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