i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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