why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
