It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize
