You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize
