I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
