you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Small penises have feelings too.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
