The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Boobs are out for the taking
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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