I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
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