just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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