I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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