I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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