I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
