"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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