What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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