But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
