The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
