They have a pepper shaker for pot.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
