Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize