I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Randomize
