its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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