Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Randomize
