Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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