I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Randomize
