It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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