google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Everything about him screamed your future.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
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