I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
