If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
