Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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