I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
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