no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Randomize