Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
you traded sex for a burrito?
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I just forgot I was standing up.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
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