It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
My breasts were aching with rage.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
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