Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
