I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
