Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Randomize
