i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
