I want to stick my p in your. b.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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