So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Randomize
