it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
