Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
