I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I got her a Nickelback box set.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Randomize
