I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
And then he peed in my hair
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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