i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
