Will you blow on my dice?
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
A bitchslap is in order.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize