Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
