theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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