I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Sorry my hands just texted you
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
