thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
