Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize