have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
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