5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
